[Scene: inside Central Perk]
Chandler: Does anyone else think David Copperfield is cute?
Monica: No, but he told me, he thinks you’re a fox.
Chandler: All right, Janice, likes him. In fact she likes him so much she put him on her freebie list.
Joey: Her what?
Chandler: Well, we have a deal, where we each get to pick five celebrities that we can sleep with, and the other one can’t get mad.
Ross: Ah, the heart of every healthy relationship. Honesty, respect, and sex with celebrities.
Monica: So, Chandler, who’s on your list?
Chandler: Ah, Kim Basinger, Cindy Crawford, Halle Berry, Yasmine Bleeth, and ah, Jessica Rabbit.
Rachel: Now, you do realize that she’s a cartoon, and way out of your league?
Chandler: I know, I know, I just always wondered if I could get her eyes to pop out of her head.
Joey: Hey, Monica, who would yours be?
Monica: First, I need a boyfriend, then I can have a list.
Joey: It’s just a game Mon. (makes a ‘Can-you-believe-her’ face to the rest of the gang.) Rach, how about you?
Rachel: Oh, I don’t know, I guess, Chris O’Donnell, John F. Kennedy, Jr., Daniel Day Lewis, Sting, and Parker Stevenson.
Rachel: Hardy Boy.
Chandler: Peter Parker.
Ross: Thank you.
Rachel: What about you honey, who would be on your list?
Ross: Well I-I-I, that kind of thing requires some serious thought. First, I’ll divide my perspective candidates into categories….
Chandler: (coughing) What a geek!
Ok, So I’m starting this with a scene from “Friends” for a reason, I promise. See, I fall asleep to the reruns on Nick at Nite and I was inspired. I have a warning in my ff.net profile that I have severe ADD when it comes to writing. It’s really bad. It’s the reason I have so many unfinished multi-chapter stories on there (and here). My muses just tend to float away and it’s hard for me to get them back. So I’m trying something new… well, two things actually: short chapters (1500 words or less) and finishing the damn story before I post it.
So I decided to put some not-so-serious thought into my own “list”, even though I no longer (technically) need one. And because I’m shameless and a little giddy, I thought I’d share it.
1) Alan Rickman
So, I first noticed him in Sense and Sensibility. I am a period movie junkie and that movie just hits every sappy nerve I have. Plus, I love Kate Winslet, but that’s neither here nor there. The fact that he also plays Severus Snape is just a bonus since I already loved Harry Potter. But he’s number one.
2) Jonathan Rhys Meyers
Yum. Sigh. Swoon. Seriously, the reason I would subscribe to Showtime every spring for five years. The Tudors. Bend It Like Beckham. August Rush. Crystalline blue eyes, the Irish accent and that mouth! Yeah… let me dry off the keyboard…
3) Tom Felton
This one makes me feel vaguely dirty as he’s nine years younger than me, but I decided, you know what? This is my damn list. He’s sexy and I don’t really care if he’s only barely legal. He’s legal and that’s what matters.
4) Gary Oldman
I’ll be totally honest, this is the only one that can really give Number Five a run for his money. I saw Immortal Beloved (period movie junkie, remember?) and absolutely fell in love, with both the music of Beethoven and the actor portraying him. I went on to see The Professional, The Fifth Element, and of course, the Harry Potter series. To be honest, I’m not jazzed about him playing Sirius Black because he’s waaaaaaay different in my imagination, but it’s not like I had a say in casting. He is SEXY.
Alright… before I put Number Five up here, I have to ask… did anyone really think he wouldn’t be on here? Really? Have you read any of my previous posts or stories?
Because… really… DUH!
Anyway, the reason for the gratuitous hotness above is simply inspiration for the little story I’ve been working on, but I won’t post until I’m done, breaking my norm. So, I have to apologize yet again to anyone waiting on tenterhooks for “DYR”, “MDP”, or any of my other unfinished stories, but my muses are off on vacation and I really have no idea if they’ll be coming back. Real life is pretty shitty right now, so I’ll stick with what I can do and if it feels like work when I’m not getting paid, well, I’ll stop until it’s fun again.
I also just realized that not a single one of my Top 5 is American. Actually… 80% of them are from the British Isles. Maybe I have a thing for accents that I never noticed before. Huh. I’m learning things about myself all the time.
Happy April, y’all.